Why You Resist Your Inner Knowing (And How Childhood Made Your Power Feel Unsafe)

You know that feeling when you get a clear hit of intuition about what you need to do next…launch that program, raise your prices, speak up in that meeting, set that boundary…and instead of following it, you immediately start second guessing yourself?

You find yourself asking everyone else what they think.
Googling for more information.
Making pros and cons lists.
Basically doing everything except trusting what you already know deep down.

It's frustrating, right? You've spent years developing your intuition, learning to trust your inner guidance, maybe even building a business around helping others do the same. But when it comes to your own knowing – especially around stepping into bigger leadership – something in you just... resists.

If this sounds familiar, I need you to know something: You're not broken, and you're not actually afraid of your intuition. You're afraid of what might happen if you trust it and act on it. 

And that fear was learned a long time ago, when you were small and your survival depended on reading the room correctly. Rooms that were dysfunctional and reliant upon everyone agreeing to trade their true selves for belonging.

When Your Inner Knowing Became Dangerous

Most of us learned early on that trusting our own knowing – especially when it went against what the adults around us wanted – wasn't safe.

Maybe you were the kid who could sense when your parents were fighting even when they said everything was "fine." But when you brought it up, you were told you were being "too sensitive" or "dramatic."

Maybe you knew instinctively that your teacher was being unfair, but when you spoke up, you were labeled as "difficult" or "rebellious."

Maybe you could feel that something wasn't right in your family system, but expressing that truth led to punishment, rejection, or being told to stop "making things up."

Over time, your brilliant little nervous system learned a crucial survival lesson: Your inner knowing might be accurate, but expressing it or acting on it could cost you love, safety, and belonging.

So you learned to doubt yourself. To defer to others. To seek external validation before trusting what you felt inside. Because in your young nervous system's assessment, it was safer to be wrong alongside everyone else than to be right all by yourself.

How This Shows Up in Your Leadership

Fast forward to now. You're an adult with your own business, your own life, your own choices to make. But that old programming is still running in the background, especially when it comes to leadership moments that require you to trust your knowing and act on it.

This might look like:

Chronically over-researching before making decisions, even when you already know what feels right

Asking for input from everyone before trusting your own guidance, then feeling confused by conflicting advice

Downplaying your insights or presenting them as questions rather than statements

Waiting for permission from some external authority before moving forward with what you know needs to happen

Feeling physically anxious when you think of stepping into bigger leadership or visibility

Second-guessing yourself constantly, even after you've made a decision that felt right

Playing devil's advocate against your own ideas before anyone else even has a chance to

Here's what's really happening: 

Your nervous system is still operating from the belief that trusting your inner knowing and acting from your own authority is dangerous to your survival, safety, and belonging.

The Leadership Fear That No One Talks About

The deeper fear beneath all of this isn't really about being wrong or making mistakes. It's about what might happen if you're right.

If you trust your knowing and it leads to success, visibility, or true impact…what if that makes you "too much" for the people in your life? What if you outgrow your current community? What if your family or friends can't handle your expansion?

What if being the leader you're meant to be costs you love and belonging?

This is the fear that keeps so many brilliant, intuitive women playing smaller than they know they're capable of. Not because they don't trust their gifts, but because at some deep level, they learned that using those gifts fully might mean being alone.

The Authority Wound

I call this the "Authority Wound,” the nervous system pattern that makes stepping into your own leadership feel like a threat to your survival. It usually includes:

Fear of being "too much" or taking up too much space

Guilt about having insights that others don't see or agree with

Anxiety about being visible or standing out from the group

Perfectionism as a way to avoid criticism or rejection

People-pleasing to maintain connection and approval

Imposter syndrome that questions whether you really know what you think you know

These are adaptive survival strategies that your nervous system developed to keep you safe in an environment where your authentic power wasn't welcome.

Creating Safety for Your Expansion

The good news is that you can rewire these patterns. You can create safety in your nervous system to trust your knowing and step into the leadership you're meant for. But it requires working with your protective patterns, not fighting or ignoring them. 

Here's where to start:

1. Acknowledge the intelligence of your resistance

Your nervous system isn't being dramatic or holding you back out of spite. It learned to resist your inner knowing because at some point, that was genuinely the safer choice. Thank your system for protecting you, and let it know you're ready to explore new possibilities. My favorite nervous system mantra is “that was then, this is now.” Show yourself that you are no longer beholden to the dysfunctional dynamics of your family of origin. 

2. Start small and build evidence as you go

Instead of forcing yourself into huge leadership leaps, practice trusting your knowing in lower stakes situations. What does your gut say about which coffee shop to work in? Which route to take home? Which email to answer first? Build evidence that trusting yourself leads to good outcomes. 

3. Find your people

One of the biggest fears around stepping into leadership is losing connection. Intentionally cultivate relationships with people who celebrate your expansion rather than feel threatened by it. This might mean joining different communities or seeking out mentors who've walked this path. This is exactly what you'll find in the Business Temple Mastermind. Join the waitlist here to be the first to know when doors open.

4. Practice nervous system mastery

When you feel that familiar anxiety around trusting your knowing or stepping up, use somatic practices to calm your system. Breathe deeply, ground your feet, remind your body that you're safe in this moment. A regulated nervous system can think more clearly and access intuition more easily.

5. Reframe leadership as sacred service

Sometimes it helps to remember that your inner knowing isn't just for you…it's meant to serve something larger. When you resist your intuition or play small, you're not just limiting yourself. You're withholding your gifts from the people who need them.

The Truth About Your Inner Knowing

Here's what I want you to remember: Your inner knowing has been accurate this whole time. The problem was never your intuition, it was the environment that taught you it wasn't safe to trust it.

You were right about those family dynamics. You were right about that teacher. You were right about what you sensed and felt, even when the adults around you couldn't handle your truth.

And you're right now too… about what you're sensing in your business, those relationship dynamics that feel off, all the things you just "know" but maybe haven't said out loud yet. Any fear or resistance you feel isn’t proof you can't trust yourself. It's proof that at some point you learned keeping other people comfortable was way safer than speaking your truth. Which honestly, when you were little and dependent on those people was the smartest thing you could do.

But you're not that little kid anymore. You have choices now. You can create safety for yourself. You can surround yourself with people who welcome your wisdom and power rather than fear it.

Your inner knowing is one of your greatest gifts, not just to yourself, but to the world. The people you're meant to serve are waiting for you to trust it fully and step into the leadership that's been calling you all along.

The question isn't whether you have what it takes to be a leader. The question is: Are you willing to rewire those old patterns and finally let your true power emerge?

This work of returning to your inner knowing is both brave and necessary. If you feel the call to do this healing with someone who understands the depth of what you're moving through, you can explore what my Somatic Alchemy Method can do for you here.  

About Leandra Rose

Leandra Rose is a Master Guide for spiritual visionaries & entrepreneurs, blending over a decade of expertise in somatic healing, nervous system mastery, and purpose-driven mentorship. Her signature approach has helped thousands break free from limiting patterns, heal deep emotional imprints, and align their lives with their soul’s mission.

Through Leandra’s programs, leaders unlock authentic self-expression, embody their spiritual gifts, and cultivate sovereign success that is both purposeful and abundant. With her unique ability to merge intuition and strategy, Leandra empowers you to step boldly into your divine calling and manifest the impactful, prosperous life you’re here to create.

Client Testimonials  

“I’ve done all the health things: red light therapy, supplements, healing modalities but this energetic shift I just experienced was more powerful than all of that combined. Now I feel like the sky’s the limit. I have the power to stay calm, clear, and embodied, even when things feel chaotic. I know I’ll carry this forward, not just for myself, but for my family. You gave me a tool I’ve been searching for my whole life and I can access it in a split second. That’s life-changing.”

 - Kerry Anne, Mother & Entrepreneur

“If you have been through traditional therapies and have an understanding of cause and reaction but still find yourself in that hazy fog of why can’t I make that shift to embrace more of what you know is possible, you may be stuck in fight and flight as I was.  

Consider Leandra’s warm, caring, and gentle walk through Somatic Therapy that taps into the subconscious allowing it to effectively soothe the nervous system by offering an alternative safe, reaction to life’s daily obstacles both small and large that bog one down and allowing you to reach out and welcome your greater self. 

Leandra helped me find and own my graceful strength that offers the power and strength to move forward and embrace life more fully.”

- S.H., Artist & teacher

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